The bigger they are, the harder they hit!

Day Two: Glamorgan v Surrey at Swalec

Odd sort of day this. It feels like day one, but of course it is day two.

One moment it looked like Glamorgan were on top. Then it swung towards Surrey. And then with the last session it went back Glamorgan’s way. From a Surrey perspective, annoying little partnerships kept sprouting up like unsightly fungus between toes. Every time you thought you’d got rid of the problem it reappeared.

Perhaps the biggest – no pun intended – threat to Surrey was Mark Cosgrove. Cosgrove’s love of the good life has already been documented, and it would be fair to say that as cricketers go these days he is a little on the large side. But am I the only one who finds this a pleasant throwback to days spent batting on the village green, scoffing down cold pies and drinking warm beer at lunch? I know cricket’s stuffed full of super fit humans who can lift up a horse box with one hand whilst doing 200 miles on an exercise bike, but c’mon! To tell someone that they are too portly to play for their national side when they have as much talent as the skinny blokes on the team is a bit naughty. Cosgrove can still move; he isn’t Mr Creosote!

And indeed, he proved as much again today by rapidly accumulating 82 runs from 107 balls, with the usual mixture of fine shots and serial killer-crazed bludgeoning, whilst fellow opener Rees went about his business in a slightly more refined manner. That both openers went whilst in the 80s was more to do with the quality bowling served up by the Surrey side rather than any horrific errors. Or bribes of a “wafer thin” after dinner mint...

Only kidding!

Meaker looks fast and frisky these days, especially now that the Sat Nav appears to be taking him in the right direction rather than telling him to take a right turn into a lake. Three wickets fell to the young man, whilst Dernbach, fresh from his incredible efforts alongside Andre Nel, dusted off the superhero costume once again and had claimed four wickets by the end of play. Looking at the relatively low scores of the day, Dalrymple for 11, Wright for 23, Maynard for 3 and Allenby for 15 you would think that Surrey would be feeling pretty good about things right now. But then look at the flip side: 58 for Wallace and 49 for Harris, and then add it in to the scores by Cosgrove and Rees, and you’re past the foot fungus stage and looking at gangrene!

I must say here that Linley also bowled very well for no reward. I think he must have run over the umpire’s dog yesterday.

All in all, a very good display of disciplined bowling and some very entertaining batting. But the highlight of the day for me was when Churchy said this about Mark Cosgrove:

“The proof’s in the pudding.”