Poetry Corner: The Battle of Derby

Ladies, and gentlemen, for your edification and delight (and because I haven't tried my hand at any poetry - in a loose sense of the word - for ages) I bring you the match report for the Derbyshire v Surrey game in the form of a rhyme! Very novel, I hope you'll agree! Make the most of it because I doubt I'll be doing it again in a hurry!

Oh, I should also point out that Mark Church did not actually go mad. I thought his little double act with Eileen was rather endearing!



The Battle of Derby

Surrey, on Derby one day did descend
Their place in the table they hoped to amend
A Middlesex thumping, not to mention three draws
Made promotion for Surrey appear a lost cause

But the team showed great spirit, determined to win
Each setback they simply just took on the chin
Both youth and experience entered the fray
Hoping their talent might win them the day

On day one they fielded, and Derby did bat
A sixfer for Linners, well how about that!
But things went to pot in the shape of young Hughes
And Surrey were very soon singing the blues

Try as they might they could not get him out
His resolve it was brave; his defiance was stout
Until Jewell stepped in and removed Derby’s hero
But the damage was done: ending four zero zero!

On day two it rained to considerable sadness
And Churchy gave way unto rain-induced madness
The inclement weather gave no room for manoeuvre
And he stayed in his box beside Eileen the Hoover

The Surrey reply didn’t quite go as planned
And Derbyshire found themselves much in command
Forty Two runs was the difference in score
(Plus the fact Surrey had to get Hughes out once more)

On day three things brightened and brought luck to Surrey
Their bowlers set about Derbyshire in a hurry
Madsen scored two, and Guptill eleven
And young Matthew Dunn must have thought ‘this is heaven!’

When Hughes went for four and Palladino a duck
A rampaging Linley once more ran amuck
Redfern and Jones felt the Viscount’s great power
And he skittled them both out in under an hour!

A match tenfer for Linley, and a fivefer for Dunn
On his first class debut, helped the game to be won!
Derbyshire crumpled for a mere ninety nine
And Surrey’s response was more than just fine

On day four Surrey roared into action again
Jason Roy’s forty five caused the home side much pain
The skip' played his part, as did Mark Ramprakash
Who, with de Bruyn won the game in a dash

So, a victory for Surrey, and much needed too
It propelled them to fourth, up the table they flew
A victory at Derby , and more soon we pray!
What a pity T20 has now got in the way!